Friday, March 6, 2009

Reminder Item

I work in a large office building with over 1000 people. Many people walk the perimeter of the cubicles for exercise. However, these said walkers have no social boundaries or awareness of their coworkers who must leave their cubicles for work purposes. This memo was sent out by the management to quell the bitterness between the walkers and the non-walkers.

Reminder item--Please remind staff who utilize the hallways for exercise to be considerate of others while walking. If they are walking in groups, they should walk in a single file and noise levels should be kept to a minimum. There should be no running or jogging in the building. Please let me know if you have questions about this.

Well, I have some questions.

Dear Management,

I am offended by swaggering, strutting, sashaying, peacocking, and flouncing. What are you going to do about that?
Skipping wasn't mentioned. Is it banned? I hope not because I would totally die. Also, I frequently like to walk with a bounce in my step, much like Kirsten Dunst in Bring It On. Will that be prohibited in the building? Finally, are meandering, promenading, and sauntering allowed?

Please let me know as soon as possible so I may get back to work.


1 comment:

  1. dear walkers - there's this magical place called "outside". you should check it out.

    dear management - exercising relieves stress and less stress leads to more tolerance of people that are different from you. you should try it sometime.