Monday, June 8, 2009

I Want My Two Dollars

Rumor has it that Oprah may have said, in these hard economic times people should tip waiters 10-15%. I can't find any confirmation of this rumor but, it seems that it is all over the interweb, and on the mind of every waiter I know. I know a lot of waiters, and they are all cursing Oprah when tipped on the 1960's end of the tipping spectrum. What I did find, is that it may not have been Oprah, but a writer for O, The Oprah Magazine. The article allegedly was printed in 2002. I can't access this article from my computer because it must be paid for before reading. Since those jerk-offs have been leaving me 10% lately, I neither have the resources to pay for said article, nor do I want to give her and her empire any of my less than normal cold hard cash. Regardless, knowing what I don't know of Oprah ( I know nothing), she had to have known what was printed in her magazine.

I have been experiencing the effect of this alleged rumor, and it is not making me happy. I fully understand that times are tough, but if you feel that tipping is not within your budget, eat at home. If you feel the need to go out to eat, then go to your local fast food restaurant where tipping is not expected (or taxed based on your sales regardless of the tips made). The creepy Burger King king will give you free Star Trek glasses if you order certain items at his restaurant. You don't have to tip, and you get something for free that you can use at the dinner table.

What I did find out is that Oprah says to tip 15-20%. This can be found on her website. Here's the rub, and I quote, "Normally, 15 to 20 percent of the total bill—20 percent for a first-class place." What the fuck Oprah? If you receive proper service, then tip the 20%. Get your head out of those elitist clouds. Okay...okay. Some of you may be saying, "what if the service is bad?" Then yes, you may choose to tip poorly, or not tip, dependent on the degree of bad. Just know that waiters in Texas, at least, make $2.13 an hour.

So, to all you a-holes that have been leaving me a $4.00 tip on a $40.00 check, I want my two dollars.

1 comment:

  1. What is instead of "What's Pissing Off Pickles Now?" You said, "What Challenges has Pickles Decided to Tackle In Her Day to Day Life?" I think you'd find Pickles would be much more pleasant to be around and maybe would inspire larger tips. Nobody like a Negative Nancy or a Pissy Pickle! I hope you have a super day!